the Hum party.

These are the ideologies of the Hum party:, the Hum party hereby promises:

• The Hum party promises two sunsets per day. one pink and one lime green.
• The Hum party promises eternal life for every Moose in the state of  South Dakota.
• airlifting Washington DC to the state of Washington, for clarity. 
• Moving the capital of the USA to Hum, Croatia 
• To outlaw speaking English in the USA. 
• to declare Latin the official languge of New Jersey. 
•  to outlaw  firearms in the UK. 
• to sell 20 out of  50 states to penguins.
• all hail our penguin overlords.
• to start wildfires  all over the country, once a year in remembrance of the movie "Tron" 
• building mountains in Arizona.
• free health care for every one but you. (yes, you. haha.)
• Humans may no longer hunt deer, but deer may  hunt humans for recreation. (with a licence) 
• adopting the Yin.
• all people must pay a fee of one hundred yin a week to live in the states of Oregon or California. 
• Ohio will be condemned. all of it.
• declaring war on every country that uses the metric system. 
• statehood for Iraq. 
• poisoning all frozen pies.   
• abolishing sin tax.
• monkeys from Brazil will take the place of presidents. they will be refereed to as "frivolous monkeys" a new frivolous monkey will be randomly chosen each year by a random man from the U.A.E, who will be randomly chosen by whichever Jonas brother draws the longest straw. 
• destroying the Jonas brothers, which admittedly makes above system impossible. 
• the state of New Jersey will become the slave state of New York. the frivolous monkey will determine how it will work.
• abolishing taxes for every one but you (yes, you.) 
• raising your taxes to 1010% of your monthly income. 
• all people who do not pay their taxes (which means you.) will be imprisoned, tared and forced to work at McDonald. (in that order)
• every man, woman and child must build three mountains a year.
• every one will be spray painted blue at birth to eliminate racism. 
• if you are still racist you will be forced to live in North Dakota. 
• every citizen must dress in a banana costume at all times.
• if you do not have a banana costume one will be provided for you.
• the frivolous monkey will be given a type writer. what ever he types is law.
• suicide will be outlawed, by penalty of death.
• Brazil will be annexed (and sold to penguins) to insure easy access to new frivolous monkeys.
• abolishing laughter. 
• merging the remaining 30 states (not counting Iraq) into one state. the state will be named by a Russian mechanic. 
• putting a end to ridiculous joke parties, such as the Hum party.
• declaring war on Sweden, if they do not deliver twelve chickens and a goat to the US embassy every Christmas. 
• oppressing you and only you.