Prophet Anonymous' prophesies for 2011 part two (parody)

Behold the continued prophecies of Prophet Anonymous! 
(It should be noted that the following prophecies are unpleasant and 20% less vague then previous prophecies.)

Prophet Anonymous' followers.

• The North Pole will merge with Ethiopia, effectively creating a new continent, on December 21st.
•  You will give Prophet Anonymous 77% of your income, and you will send out the first check right now.
•  Microsoft will quit developing software, and begin to manufacture door knobs, which will be able in Doorknob home ($119), Doorknob Professional ($199.99), Doorknob server ($1,209) and Doorknob ultimate ($319.99.)
•  Aliens will destroy the earth on December 30th, after watching a Kenneth Copeland broad cast for the first time.
• Nationwide will no longer be on your side.
• Prophet Anonymous will be exposed as a false prophet.
• Uzbekistan will annex the United States.
• the United States will be renamed to "Little Uzbekistan."
• the Moon will come down with amnesia on January 31st.
• a Frenchman will invite something called a "Aceiih"  it will be used for dish washing.
• Vampire bats will infect humans with a disease called "Bat flu."  the disease will force people to do the bat-tusi until they die, and it will ultimately be contracted by Adam West.
• It will be discovered that Darwin's theory of evolution is a half truth, as it only applies to folding chairs. 
• Stella Recto will evolve from current folding chairs.
• Penguins will become extinct, as Stella Recto will prey on penguins.
• poor attempts to piggy back of off the success of a past blog post will be made punishable by law.

Prophecies by
Prophet Anonymous.

Prophet anonymous' Prophecies for 2011 part one (parody)

Read the Continued prophecies HERE
And the 2012 prophecies HERE
__________________________________________________________________________________
Behold Prophet Anonymous, the modern prophet and apostle! the prophet was saved via alter call at a Billy Graham crusade in 1972 and he began his prophesying ministry in December 6th, 1974 when he predicted that his neighbor's (Mrs.Elkridge) cat would play with a ball of yarn some time before the year 1980. his prophecy came true only two weeks after it was made, to Mrs.Elkridge's amazement.
Prophet Anonymous has made several high profile prophecies since then, most recently his prophecy that some one who's first name starts with a letter between B and Y would be elected to the presidency in 2008.
Prophet Anonymous has now came forward with a new set of very important prophecies that will take place in 2011, Prophet Anonymous himself has asked me to list his 2011 prophecies. so with out further ado, Prophet Anonymous' 2011 prophecies:

The only known photo of Prophet Anonymous.

The cruel fortune of a blogger

If your a blogger you know what it's like.
only three days since your last post and your numbers are already slipping, you throw in a couple new widgets and maybe "borrow" a writing from a man who died long before you were born. you've even tried joining that web ring but alas, your visitors are still
dwindling low.

(More after the jump)

IREHR's report on the Tea Party (as found on the NAACP'S website.)

If you read this blog regularly, you know that I really hate the Tea Party.
 I've often accussed them of being racist, but do you need proof?  well, the IREHR filed a report on the Tea Party....and guess what...come to find out, the Tea Party IS RACIST (surprise, surprise...)
 you can read the report in PDF right HERE

FROM THE NAACP'S WEBSITE:

"Karen Pack

Karen Pack describes herself as “a Christian, a Tea Party Member, a Constitutionalist and a Patriot”, is the leader of the Wood County Tea Party in Texas. But she also has a history with the Ku Klux Klan. Documents show that Karen Pack of Winnsboro, subscribed to the “White Patriot” tabloid, and that Thom Robb’s Knights of the Ku Klux Klan listed her as an “official supporter.”

Roan Garcia-Quintana

Roan Garcia-Quintana of Mauldin, South Carolina is involved in several local Tea Parties and served as “advisor and media spokesman” for the 2010 Tax Day Tea Party rally in Greenville, South Carolina. Garcia-Quintana recently joined the National Board of Directors of the Council of Conservative Citizens (CofCC), the largest white nationalist group in the country and direct descendant of the white Citizens Councils that fought to defend Jim Crow segregation during the 1950s and 1960s."

It goes on... any way, check out the report.

Brandon Montgomery.

We're in a web ring now. (big whoop, wanna fight about it?)

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the Puritans and the capitalist merchant.

The Puritans didn't take to kindly to capitalism. I love them for that.

the following comes from Puritan John Winthrop.

1.     At a general court holden at Boston, great complaint was made of the oppression used in the country in sale of foreign commodities; and Mr. Robert Keaine, who kept a shop in Boston, was notoriously above others observed and complained of, and, being convented, he was charged with many particulars; in some,

Read A.W Pink's the Sovereignty of God here.